Better In Time
by GLaxCait
Summary: The story of another addition to the Cullen family. *Rate and review! It's my first fanfic attempt. MORE CHAPTERS ADDED OVER TIME!
1. Attack

**Caitlin**

It's getting late. I knew I should have gone back hours ago, I _knew _it. I couldn't, though- stupidly, I listened to Sammy, as I knew I would, as I ALWAYS do. Someone could have gotten hurt at home, or killed, or broken something. And it will all be her fault, because she saw it first.

So now I'm stuck, trapped inside my own head, running around the entire forest looking for something that isn't there. _You need a break, Caitlin. _At least that's what I've been telling myself. Maybe if I started listening.... I sighed. When was the last time I listened to myself?

That got me shaking. Of course. It's been, what, eighty years? A century? And Brian still has me affected. Better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all… what a sick joke. I always knew moving on was best for my people, but I guess that's me- too damn selfish. Sadness doesn't suit me, and yet it's still there when he crosses my mind.

About one hundred yards off, I spotted a deer- but so obviously not. Of course it was Ricky, with the odd golden fur. I wondered, though, why he had chosen a deer- so vulnerable, so weak. So amazingly not like him. I slowed to a silent jog- ambush a friend. How perfect, a distraction.

Suddenly, a white, unrecognizable blur shot out of nowhere- and into Ricky. For half a second, I was just standing there, wondering what the hell happened. And then I ran, all my instincts taking over. Save your people. Protect your people. Don't worry about self preservation; you know you can't die anyway.

I shot into the clearing; into _it_ fast a bullet, yet silent as the night- the stupid creature didn't see me coming. He was hard as rock and white as a ghost; cold like ice. It had better not be…

With a snarl that would have sent anybody else cringing, he- it looked distinctively male- sprang immediately to his feet to attack. Despite the danger Ricky was in, I couldn't help but notice how my attack didn't seem to affect him; how graceful he was. Oh, how I wish that could be me- unaffected.

After two seconds of this insane battle, I realized he had no intention of giving up- just as I had no intention of killing him. With a small, unnoticed sigh, I realized I would have to imprison him- and since he didn't appear to have any physical weakness, I was going to have to use mental pain to immobilize him. I concentrated for an incredibly brief period of time- and he was on the ground, withering. The sight nearly broke my heart, yet I was able to appreciate his taking it in silence. Because _damn_. That hurt.

To spare him agony- and because he kept trying to get back up- I quickly grew a silver cage out of the soil. Realizing that he had to be strong as nails, I reinforced the cage with a permanent force field. Hopefully he wasn't so bizarre as to not be affected by _that._

As soon as I was done with my little jail, I let up on the torture. Even thought he was my enemy at the moment, I could never get used to the pain they felt. I hated it more than anything; anything in the world.

I shot the creature a quick, filthy glance- he had _attacked _one of _my people-_ and realized he was looking at me. All I could think to say was, "I'll be back"- and that has to be the stupidest, most idiotic, most Arnold Schwarzenegger thing to say in the history of anybody's lifetime. But I was mesmerized, for a moment- his eyes were the most compelling color- in between liquid gold and midnight.

Then I shook my head. I'm an idiot- save Ricky. Get him to the house. I sped over to him and looked his now human body over, examining quickly over his swearing. Shit. He had gotten bit- that was going to swell, and fill with disgusting pus, and then be sore for the next week. At least that confirmed my suspicions- vampire. I hoped he was happy.

So as I was helping poor Ricky back to the house, I allowed myself to think about Sam's disturbing predictions, all centered on going to the concert with Kasey. Go on your trip- three people will die, many more injured, destruction galore, ect. Stay home- one person injured… and joy. Fall in love.

I shook my head. Not. I had been down that road, and even almost a century later, I was still crying over him. Almost two centuries later, and I still felt the ghostly pain in my right leg; still felt the fire licking my right arm.

I almost smiled. Two centuries.

And I would do it again.

**Johnson**

I wish I had taken up Edward's offer. But he and Emmett and Jasper were too kind to me- offering to hunt with their newest, gloomy brother. It was almost sad how they pitied me. It would have been a bore with them (they were so much better hunters than me), and God knows I wouldn't have been able to think with Edward around. But neither would he; I think he was still upset about that- "stealing their talents," as he put it. Right, so he could read minds and my gift could go to waste.

`I sighed. I sort of hated this new life- no humans. It wasn't that abstinence I hated, it was the thirst; no matter how many big game you ate, it was always the humans you wanted. They would always be top priority, top dollar, always on your mind in a painful way. You always wanted to eat the humans, even if you loved them. I wanted to be safe. Wanted badly what Carlisle had, an intense self control that allowed him to do what he loved. I didn't want to be a monster, but despite my good intentions, it was hard to undo what was done.

I moodily slaughtered a grizzly bear. It wasn't fair- maybe I was being a crybaby, but Jasper could adapt to their ways, in less time then I could. Even after fifteen years, humans were indescribably compelling- animals didn't compare.

Angry now, I tracked a mountain lion. Bella! Even Bella could resist the thirst- on her first day. She caught the scent of a human, _on her first hunting trip- _and stopped. Resisted. Didn't go crazy with thirst and kill them both, as I would have done, and still would have.

I sighed. It was useless to think about, and wasn't that why I was here, hunting? Trying to make myself think that I could do it, even though I knew if I caught scent of a human, it would be their death on my shoulders? I snorted. As if that would have been the first time.

I heard a rustling sound in the meadow, to my left. Only a deer, nothing exciting. Boring as usual. But then a gust of wind blew its scent my way, and I noticed something odd- this deer was golden in a way that wasn't common at all. And its scent was strange- animal but not quite through and through. I decided to hunt it, maybe a little bit of alien sport would liven me up. I jogged in from the right and sprang toward it, bit it- and its blood tasted strange; not metallic, exactly, pleasant…

I was on my back somehow. But for a millionth of a second, I was shocked- I smelled something more compelling than I ever had in my life. I jumped up to attack; that was all I wanted, its blood, _her _blood; it sang to me almost violently. I was crazy with thirst; I knew it was going to happen. I almost sighed- Carlisle and Esme would be so disappointed. But I needed it. I simply could not live if I didn't hunt it.

I attacked- somehow this human that wasn't human; this ungodly goddess had me on the ground. It was all so fast. I was in agony. But I knew, somehow, that she was still what I wanted. I needed to kill her, so I endured it quietly and tried to keep fighting.

I ended up in a cage- like it grew out of the ground. Silly human god, don't you know I can break it? Then I felt something stronger lock me in- some kind of a force field. Damn it. Now I couldn't get up if I tried, this cage was now truly a cage. From the depths of my being, I found self control enough to make myself sit still to look at her- and she was looking back. She had the face of an angel- a very angry, furious, hate filled angel. She snarled, "I'll be back." And I was instantly reminded of that idiotic movie with that stupid Austrian. Just another example of American entertainment.

I smiled grimly to myself. Maybe I _could_ do it- locked in a cage, a reinforced cage that could not be broken. I glanced over at my captor, now examining a human. The deer was not in sight, and it seemed that the human was the deer I attacked- if his cussing was any clue he had been bitten. So these were not humans, and they were obviously not vampires. Not wolf men either. Interesting. And it was almost motherly, the way she protectively helped him through the forest. I was instantly reminded of Esme.

Esme. My throat tightened. She would be so scared when Alice told her. Was that what Alice meant, when she said she couldn't see my future? Because I was going to die? I didn't think the human goddess would kill me- she cared too much. And Alice also said she saw me coming home from my trip a little late, but happy and hopeful.

I shook my head. Who knew anymore? If I was coming home, but Alice could not see my future on my hunting trip- then my life was going to be tangled with one of these strange creatures. Alice could not see them. They weren't familiar.

And if I was going to be happy? Hopeful? I chuckled. Wait and see, that's all I could do anymore.


	2. Aftershock

**Caitlin**

Damn. Ricky was loud when he was hurt. And _annoying. _He didn't stop once with his obnoxious stream of profanities the entire way to the house. Finally, when we got there- it seemed to take years; maybe it did- I dumped him on a couch. Roughly. This coaxed out another outburst of cursing. Oh. My. Gosh.

"Ricky! You are not the first person to be bitten by a vampire. Not by a long shot. So shut your mouth, get over it; May will be here in just a second to get you cleaned up." I smiled, showing my teeth. This did nothing, of course; Ricky just glared at me sullenly. What a baby.

I ignored him, walked away. Confused. What Sam predicted couldn't be true, even though she always was right. She probably tacked on joy and love to get me to stay home- she was planning a big shopping trip… Ugh. I'm so stupid. I should have double checked. Trusting my friends' powers was not always the smartest thing to do, considering their manipulative options to get me to do what they wanted. At least double checking was an option. Laughing without humor, I thought of how it was sometimes- _sometimes-_ good to be me. I sighed. Time to see Gunny.

Louis Joseph "Gunny" Gunpher was the oldest person in our institute. He had an interesting immortality- he couldn't get sick and he wasn't getting any older. This was sad to think about. He was my best friend, wiser and older than me. I went to him with anything; he didn't judge and he wasn't biased.

I sighed heavily. Sometimes it struck me how pathetic I was.

I got tired of walking. Teleporting with a sigh, I appeared outside his room. "Can I come in?" Reading his answer in his mind, I waltzed in.

He smiled. So welcoming, so joyful, so kind. So much more then I deserved in a person.

_Hello, child. _"Hey, Gunny." Jumping to the point, I told him about my problem with Sammy's predictions. "I was planning to go to a concert with Kasey today, because we both know how much I need a break. But I, being a worrywart, asked Sam what would happen if I went as opposed to if I didn't go." I shuddered. "She said if I went, three people would die, many more would be injured, and an entire section of the house would be destroyed. The usual." "I smiled grimy. "But she said if I stayed, only one person would be injured…." I hesitated. Now I felt stupid; it was only _Gunny, _for crying out loud! I took a deep breath. "She said if I stayed, then I would find joy. Fall in love. But I can't believe her- it's not good for anybody." I sucked in my breath.

Instead of laughing at me, Gunny listened in thoughtful silence. He usually didn't speak around me; he thought- Gunny liked the fact that nobody was going to listen to him. _Hmmm. _He was suppressing a smile. _Well, Caitlin, how long has it been since you were happy? _"I'm usually happy. Her exact word was joy- and you know they aren't always the same thing." His theory was that joy and happiness were different- happiness is natural; joy is discovered.

_Well, then, when was your last joy? You've been sad for a long time now, despite your natural happiness. _I almost chocked. "My last joy… was about a century ago." I was whispering. "Since Brian died."_ Then even though you think she was just trying to keep you here-_ I was staring, openmouthed; sometimes it's like_ he _can read _my_ mind-_ I think you should trust her. _He was smiling, contemplating my reaction. _I know you well, Caitlin. I've had a hundred fifty years now to figure you out. _"How could I trust her? I can't fall in love-"I couldn't find the words to say my life belonged to my people- it was them I cared about. My feelings meant next to nothing anymore.

Gunny smiled gently. _Caitlin, _he thought quietly, _I've accepted the fact that my death will be violent. I've known for a long time now. But it hasn't stopped me from living. _Even quieter, and gently as possible. _He's not coming back, Caitlin. He's in a better place, and you're never going to get there if you can't accept that. _Sometimes I hated wise people. They were crushingly, despairingly right. _Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm ordering a pizza- care to join? _Damn. I love pizza. "No, I've got to discuss…options with the prick that attacked Ricky." Surprise flitted across his face; I had forgotten to mention that. But all he thought was _Well, have fun. _

He knew not to push it. Smart man.

**Johnson**

I hate cages.

The strange, claustrophobic feeling that even a vampire could get when stuck in a small enclosed space was almost sickening. On the bright side, though, this gave me a chance to think about my captor.

I knew several things about her from our brief encounter. She was not a human, she was not a vampire, she was not a wolfman. She was powerful, with a wide array of talents. She was motherly. She smelled divine, incomparable to anything I have ever smelled before.

And she was beautiful. Her eyes were a strange color; gold and yellow and brown and green all together. Sort of orange. They were shaped- when she wasn't hatefully glaring- like large sideways ovals. Her nose was a little bit bigger than what was considered normal beauty, but it accented her face well. She appeared to be Canadian, with a tall, slender build.

And the way she _moved! _She was as graceful as I had ever seen- more graceful than any vampire I had ever come across. She seemed to move with the shadows; she didn't glide, she melted. Oddly, though, she seemed to subconsciously favor her left side- as if she didn't trust her right leg to hold her up.

And, like me, she was imperfect. I flexed my hand and my foot absentmindedly- feeling, for an instant, pain where my toe and finger used to be. Her right arm was badly burned; noticeable scars flexed in the moonlight when she moved. It seemed strange to me, that someone so perfect could have such a mark.

Smiling sadly to myself, I thought that the scars might reflect on her inner personality- beautiful people weren't always what they cracked up to be. Vampires were a perfect example of that- oh, I'm gorgeous, come over here so I can suck your blood. I snorted. _That _would be the day.

I thought about the fact that my power didn't seem to affect her. If a fight ever were to break out again, she would probably have the upper hand- but taking my life wasn't such a crime, considering my past. I don't think she would kill me, though. She seemed too motherly, seemed to care too much. The sad truth was, though, that if I got the chance, I knew what I would do. I would kill her in an instant.

I wished Carlisle could do more. Sometimes it hurt me to watch my family go about their lives, not worrying about who they would kill today- they could always come home with a happy heart. I was the weak link, and I hated it. Weakness was not a proud thing, and I was an extremely proud person. It was almost physically painful to know that I would probably be the reason for our next move.

I sighed and turned. I heard her coming. I hoped my captor killed me quickly.


	3. Interrogation

**Caitlin**

After my talk with Gunny, I realized four things: I didn't feel so bad about Brian (for the moment), I was more confident about Sam's predictions, and I really had no idea what to do about the creature currently residing two hundred yards from the people I would give my life for (if such a thing were possible). That was the sucker punch of the eternally wise- they had the annoying ability to make a situation better and worse at the same time.

I decided the first and more pressing matter that had to be dealt with was what to do about my prisoner. I needed to talk with him, figure out his intentions and then proper punishment from all that. My job sucks.

I sighed. Better start walking.

On my way, I thought about Gunny's point blank reference to his death- something he usually didn't bring up. _I've accepted that my death will be violent, Caitlin. _He usually only addressed it when he needed to drive a point home; dismal as the subject was. In a way, though, I was almost jealous of him- at least he knew he was going to die someday. Why did _I _have to be so masochistic? I could let myself die… but I wouldn't. My masochistic ways were provoked by my anti- sadistic tendencies, making death completely impossible.

I reached the clearing in record time, lost in thought like I was. I almost stepped in as soon as I got there, but he appeared to be… brooding. Even though I promised myself I wouldn't, I took a look inside his mind. He was thinking about a man named Carlisle; they appeared to be related somehow. I also picked up on the interesting fact that I smelled irresistible to him; flattering, sort of, I guess. But to make it easier on him, I shut off his sense of smell- no point in him attacking me.

I shifted my weight, and a twig snapped. Stupid leg.

His head whipped around toward me. Apparently, if I were to kill him, he would want it quick. Easier said than done, I suppose, but "can't" and "won't" are two different ballgames.

I didn't speak for a moment, watching him watch me. Vampires never seized to amaze me, with their odd, beautiful pale skin and perfect features. This one seemed to be even paler then any others I had encountered- or was it just the moonlight? His skin glittered like a thousand tiny diamonds coated the surface; it was breathtaking.

I shook my head inhumanly fast. No distractions.

"So." I was pleased that my voice was steady and strong, considering how much I didn't want to be here. "You attacked one of my people. Care to explain why?" Ouch. Choice wasn't a good option.

He eyed me uneasily. "What was that?" His voice was better than his skin; soft and deep. Shockingly kind. But I knew better- being fooled right now could be deadly.

And come on. Vampires were smarter than that. "You attacked one of my people. Tried to eat them, in fact. Was there a reason, or were you just filling your quota for the day?"

"_Your_ people?"

"Correct."

He chuckled. "What are they, your pets?"

I winced. I really didn't think I sounded like that… "It's nothing to you. Just tell me why the hell you tried to take a chunk out of Ricky." Ahh. Names were bad too- I was slipping up.

His face hardened. "Tell me who you are and why I should be afraid of you."

Hardball? Not likely. "I will _show_ you, parasite, as soon as I know why you were on my land." Nice.

He smiled suddenly. "Oh, well it's not that confusing, really. I was hunting."

That got me… vampires didn't eat animals. That I knew of. So that meant he had to have been hunting us on purpose. I was so shocked, I simply stammered, "Er, what? Hunting?"

He hesitated for a second, and then spoke slowly, like he was talking to a child. "Yes. You see, I was trying _not_ to eat humans- that was the point of the hunting exercise. But I smelled…" He seemed to struggle with words for a moment. "I smelled your deer- Ricky, I guess. And he smelled strange; not all animal, something else." He shrugged. "So I hunted him. Of course, I can't exactly say I was hunting humans- you seem better equipped than that."

He was right. Damn. "And so why did you attack me? When you saw I was a human."

He smiled cleverly. "As I said, not exactly human- you're talented. But I already answered." He leaned back casually, triumphant. "Now tell me who you are and why I should be quaking in my shoes."

Right again. I figured I should just cave- I could totally take him. "What do you want to know, leech?"

"Your name, for starters."

"Next." For some reason, I couldn't trust him with that.

He sighed. "Well… what are you?"

That got me for a moment. What was I? I didn't know myself. The basics were here, but there was more, considering the fact that I was leader and protector. For a second, I let myself drift back to Sam's predictions of love and joy… I shook my head again. "I am a mutant- vampire, werewolf, and human." That ought to confuse him. "My turn. Why did you attack me, after seeing that I was human… human_oid?" _I corrected myself- no need for him to.

He sighed sadly. After hesitating again, he softly said, "I couldn't help myself. I've only absented from humans for… fifteen years now." He looked crushed. Oh no, damsel in distress scene. And suddenly, realization hit me like a ton of bricks.

Without another word, I turned and walked into the forest.

**Johnson**

She stepped into the clearing- and I mentally gasped. My memory did her no justice- she was stunning. She was just standing there, watching me watch her. I could tell she was proud- the way she held herself, you could tell she owned the world. Not in an arrogant way, she was just a natural protector…

"So." While thinking, I missed her first word. I strained to listen for more. "You attacked one of my people. Care to explain why?" Her voice was strong and high. It was an entire choir of angels, all in one accusatory sentence. But I had missed what she said, listening to her glorious voice. Even though I was uncomfortable, I asked, "What was that?"

She narrowed her strange, beautiful orange eyes. "You attacked one of my people. Tried to eat them, in fact. Was there a reason, or were you just filling your quota for the day?"

That was mean. Quota- as if all vampires were vicious and hateful. I didn't understand what she said, though. "_Your _people?"

She was annoyed. "Correct."

I had to laugh. So she did own the world. "What are they, your pets?" Or something.

She tried not to grimace. Unsuccessfully. "It's nothing to you. Just tell me why the hell you tried to take a chunk out of Ricky." She winced.

Hmm. So his name was Ricky. That still didn't explain why this was a pixie person I should be afraid of. I put on my serious face and snarled, "Tell me who you are and why I should be afraid of you." She looked bemused; she honestly thought we were a fair fight.

She challenged, "I will _show_ you, parasite, as soon as I know why you were on my land."

I considered. Really, there was no point in not telling her- if it came to a fight, one of us would kill the other. And I didn't think she would come out on top.

So I smiled. "Oh, well it's not that confusing, really. I was hunting." Gotcha. She looked absolutely furious, and suddenly shocked. All she could gasp was, "Er, what? Hunting?"

Again, I hesitated. She already thought vampires were evil, so setting her strait couldn't be too much of a crime. I spoke slowly, though- no use in repeating. "Yes. You see, I was trying _not_ to eat humans- that was the point of the hunting exercise. But I smelled…" he wasn't a deer, and he obviously wasn't human. "I smelled your deer- Ricky, I guess. And he smelled strange; not all animal, something else." I shrugged; if she couldn't figure out the rest she was simply an idiot. "So I hunted him. Of course, I can't exactly say I was hunting humans- you seem better equipped than that." Powers upon powers galore.

She looked aggravated, like she wanted me to be wrong. "And so why did you attack me? When you saw I was a human."

I smiled. No, it was my turn to ask a question. "As I said, not exactly human- you're talented. But I already answered." I got comfortable. "Now tell me who you are and why I should be quaking in my shoes."

She scowled. "What do you want to know, leech?"

Oh, come on. Again with the stereotypes. "Your name, for starters." Start with something simple.

"Next." That was frustrating- so simple and yet she couldn't answer it.

I sighed. Next question, then. "Well… what are you?" Because that was bugging me to no end.

She hesitated. I figured she probably wouldn't answer that, because of the whole no name thing. But to my surprise, she said, "I am a mutant- vampire, werewolf, and human." What? There was no such thing, that I knew of. That was confusing and frustrating.

Triumphantly, she turned the tables on me. "My turn. Why did you attack me, after seeing that I was human… human_oid?" _And there was no way I was going to respond to her last answer- her snotty, arrogant attitude was too annoying.

But her question, simple as it was, was so depressing that I was suddenly loaded with sadness. It had been a while since I had talked about it with anybody besides my family and the wolves. So it was with an embarrassing sadness that I said softly, "I couldn't help myself. I've only absented from humans for… fifteen years now." I felt horrible. Absolutely worthless. She, however, looked shocked. And without a word, she turned and walked into the forest.

Surprised, I thought about the girl for a second. She was a hybrid, a mutt that wasn't supposed to exist. She was compelling, she was smart, she was caring. Easy to like, and shockingly fun to talk to- despite the situation.

And then I snarled with a jolt. Throughout the conversation, I hadn't once been compelled to attack her. I hadn't smelled anything at all.


	4. New Sight

**Caitlin**

So I was wandering through the forest, pretty aimless. I knew the best thing to do would be to talk to Sam, as she could explain exactly what she meant. But I needed to think; if this was what I thought it was, then I was either in for pain or joy. Or both.

Some people wonder why I don't just use the powers, and not check with the true holders. But it's kind of confusing; part pride and part targeted specialty. I check with the holders because it kept their pride intact- the fact that they could do something that only one other person could do the exact same way. And the other reason had to do with that same thing- because they could only do the one thing and I could do them all, they did it best. They got the most practice.

But even when keeping that in mind, I was nervous about talking to Sam. I was afraid of what my decisions would lead to next, who would die and who would suffer. Who would be in pain because of my idiocy.

So I postponed. I needed to eat, and I couldn't go back to the house- my conscience would lead me right to her. I sighed. Vampire hunting tonight.

Without losing my human mindset, I switched into neutral hunting mode. Nose in the air, I smelled around for food. Elk herd nearby. Sweep in from the right; blind spot. Attack.

All the while, I was thinking. Was there really any difference between me and the guy in the cage? I was hunting, just like him. But I wasn't hunting humans. And why? I was part human. There were humans that I loved very much. With a jolt, I remembered a part of our conversation: "I was trying not to hunt humans. That was the point of the hunting exercise." But that wasn't traditional for vampires. And yet he was eating animals anyway. He was part human. He probably loved some humans.

With a jolt, I saw in crystal clarity. Just because we had both been dealt a certain hand- had the option to be a monster- didn't mean we wanted to. He wanted it less than I did. And he had a harder time at it; humans were his natural food source.

I felt an overwhelming sense of compassion for him at that moment. I needed to help him. Using Sam's gift, I saw what would happen if I went back right now. I would offer my help, and he would take it.

And that was all I needed to know. Turning, I left my prey and darted into the forest.

I got to the meadow in record time. I was ready to blurt out everything, but when I got there, I stopped dead in my tracks. He stared at me, horror crossing his features briefly. Then he was composed.

_He still attacked one of your people, _my mind was telling me._ He has to be punished._

And then I realized that I didn't care. He needed help. I could give it. And it was as simple as that.

**Johnson**

I sat there in stunned silence. I hadn't smelled anything. That was unnatural. That went against my nature. That was wrong. For over three hours, I sat there, still as a stone. Not hard, that. But it was a shocked feeling, not a natural feeling, that left me scared stiff.

I was _scared_ of her. She had power that was unparalleled by any other I had ever seen.

And, just like any other self fulfilling prophecy, she suddenly appeared in the meadow. I was still scared; she was _so _powerful. She seemed like she was bursting at the seams, and then suddenly she wasn't. She was hesitant. And then, determined, she opened her mouth and the symphony began.

"You can't resist human blood; you eat animals, I should have seen it, but I really haven't heard of a vampire that didn't kill humans before." She shook her head. "But I can help you get over that, if you want. I have… talents, as you pointed out before. So. What do you say?" She looked at me, half hoping I would say yes and half hoping I would say no.

But I only had one question on my mind. "Why can't I smell you?" It came out as a whisper. "Why can't I smell _anything? _It's not right. I need to smell."

Again, she hesitated for a fraction of a second. Then she shrugged. "I smell good. I thought it would help you." She shrugged. "Anyway, I'm not giving it all back at once. That would be dangerous." She frowned, concentration highlighting her eccentric, beautiful features. "So do you want me to help you? It seems like you could use it. Badly." A small smile played at her lips. "Nobody wants you attacking random citizens in that peaceful little town down there."

I wasn't sure what to do. She seemed desperate to help me, and yet completely opposed to the idea. And why did she want to help me so badly?

But after a moment I sighed. What good did it do anymore? "All right. But only if you answer my questions." Of which there were many.

She nodded eagerly. "Of course."

"Who are you?"

Her face fell briefly, then a hopeful seed began to grow in her eyes. "My name is Caitlin Anne LaChance." And that seemed to be the end of her answer.

So I continued with my mental list of questions. "Why do you want to help me get over my… problem… so badly?"

Again, she hesitated. Then she softly whispered, "It seems right. It feels like the right thing to do." She laughed without humor. "And I'm all about the right thing. I'm also tired of defying… fate, I guess, by staying away from you." She blinded me with her smile. "Despite the fact that I don't think it's right for anybody but me. I'm sick of doing the right thing. I'm okay with that." And that was odd. _Stay away from me? _I wasn't about to ask, though. More pressing questions came to mind.

Like what she really was. "What are you? Besides a… mutant. You are much more powerful than any of your kind, if there are more of you." I said it as a statement, not a question. And it wasn't a mystery that there were more. She was protective.

She looked resentful. Hesitant. A little wistful, even. She asked quietly, "Would you understand completely if I said I didn't trust you enough to tell you that?" And I found that I did.

She wanted to know if I had any family. Anybody that I lived with. I told her I did, and she said, "I need you to go to them and tell them that you won't be home for a couple weeks. You can't really go anywhere, because too much time away from… training will make you go back." She laughed. "That last thing I need is a bunch of vampires storming into my house and mauling my family. Can you go and be back in one week?" I snorted. "I could go and be back in _one day._" She laughed and explained, "I need a week to prepare my own family. And my family is… pretty huge. I think I trust you enough to come back." And with that, my cage was gone. I was free.

I started to walk off, and then I heard her ask, "Can I get a question in?"

"Of course."

She smiled. "Who are you?"

Oh. Easy. "I am Johnson Xavier Pinnelly. Pleased to make your acquaintance." I smiled.

She smiled back. "Ditto. See you in a week, Johnson."

And she turned, and she walked into the forest.


	5. Resolution

**Caitlin**

Walking into the forest, I realized that I'm operating on a strange euphoric high. It wasn't necessarily the best thing, either- the last time I had felt like this was when Brian was alive. And we all knew how that had turned out. Talking to Johnson Xavier Pinnelly was… lifting. It made me feel alive again.

I remembered Sam's prediction. Joy and love. What I said to him was true- I _am_ sick of doing the right thing- but at the same time, this could end badly. People could die, because I got caught up in my own life and wasn't there to save them.

I shook my head. He made me happy. I wasn't about to let that go to waste.

As I walked back to the house, I filtered through the thoughts I heard till I found Sam's. _Hi Cait! Come on up, class ends in 5 minutes. I'm going to the cafeteria- starving! Mr. Engle is a drag._ She saw me listening for her. Good old Sam. She was one of the best people I knew, for many reasons.

I laughed. I'd have to yell at her for watching during history again. She was always jealous because I got to skip and she didn't. Well, I had gone through high school nine times. I could teach the classes better than the teachers.

Walking back to the school, I slowed down to appreciate the sky. The stars and moon were fading as the sun was just coming up- but somehow for a moment stars, moon, and sun were coexisting in the same sky at the same time. Absolutely beautiful.

I felt something twist in my heart. Brian and I used to watch the stars.

I checked my phone. 4:30- nice time for a morning swim. Maybe after I spoke to Sam. That is one of the many awesome things about running on 3 hours of sleep a week. All the free time left you no room to complain about having no time- and because of the fact that nobody at our school needed a human amount of sleep, classes were offered at all times. Like now.

Remembering something, I made a mental note to talk to Jason- he would get the word out that I wasn't going to be around as much for a while. That would be really helpful, because all my work would be done in an hour. Jason could deliver information with a simple brush of his hand on skin.

Teleporting suddenly to the cafeteria, I sat at our usual table to wait for my friends. I didn't have to wait long; people flooded into the large room five seconds after I got there. It was a madhouse.

Craning my neck and replying to any "hellos" targeted my way, I searched for Sam. She deftly maneuvered her way through the crowd of people over to me with a huge plate of food.

"Lazy!" she greeted me. "Making me get your food! I could have eaten it by the time I got over here!"

I smiled. "Hey to you too, whiner." I stole a slice of pizza off the plate. "We need to talk, Sammy."

Watching, always watching, she replied, "You stayed, so you're going to end up falling in love. That was what I saw- and am I wrong?" Not arrogant, she just was always right. In a softer voice, she pointed out the obvious. "He's not coming back, Caitlin. Moving on doesn't seem to be an option for you. And vengeance just isn't your thing." I opened my mouth to speak, and before I could get a word in edgewise, she said, "Yeah, this thing you're doing with this vampire is a good thing. The right thing- one less ravaged vampire on the loose. And he needs it too. Let's go do something before our next class." She rolled her eyes. "Or are you going to skip again?"

I grinned. "Well, I was_ going_ to skip- but now you've called my bluff and I _have_ to go."

Sam laughed. "It's home ec! We're making cookies today- and those are going to be some damn good cookies. Here's to snobby private freak school!" She offered her coke.

I couldn't help it. I laughed too; I loved the way she could make fun of our condition like that. I tapped my coke can to hers. "Hear, hear!" And that was the end of our conversation about my sad future.

"Hey, when is home ec. today?" I asked. Elective classes jumped around in times, and I had already done all that. No way was I going to memorize the schedule _again. _

Sam huffed. "Seven thirty!" she exclaimed. "Remember these things, _please, _Caitlin. Super perfect memory goes to waste if you never use it." I turned away and checked my phone, ignoring her annoyance. It was 6:15. Time to find Jason and go for my swim.

I turned back and said my goodbyes. Using the power to find people, I discovered that he was at the far end of the building. Walking toward the door, I casually blipped out of the space and right next to Jason.

He jumped a mile. "What the hell, Caitlin! You gave me a heart attack!" He clutched at his heart, feigning just that. Suddenly he swept me into a bone crushing bear hug. I grinned. Jason was like the big brother everybody's always wanted.

"Hey you. I need you to do something for me." I explained my situation to him, telling him exactly what he needed to say so people wouldn't worry.

"Got that?" I asked. He nodded his face falling. He touched my hand, thinking, _Geez, this place is going to be boring without you around to annoy. _ Then he laughed and jumped out of the way when I shocked the hand touching me. I couldn't help laughing along with him. "Don't worry, Jason, I'm, sure somebody will get sick of you like I am," I teased. "Off to go swimming- toodles!" I walked away, fully aware that he was making stupid faces at my back. When I saw I have eyes on the back of my head… Well, I'm not always kidding.

I smiled hugely walking away. I thanked God every day for my friends- my family- because they kept me rooted to life. They give me an escape from painful memories, but after a while I always left to go off on my own. I would not inflict my painful history on others.

I decided to fly to my room. It had been a couple days since I had been in the air, and the free rush was almost as good as flesh and blood people. Better, in some ways- there was no Brian in the sky. Except for eagles, and there are no eagles in Boston.

Teleporting outside, I jumped in to the air and rose higher and higher. Instead of going straight into my window, I circled the beautiful city. I wasn't originally from Boston, but it had been my city for so long that I truly felt like it was my home. I belonged here.

Suddenly, I remembered my plans. The vampire in me caused easy distraction, and the twinkling lights out on the harbor were more than enough. Watching it made me decide to go swimming in the ocean. Jason would say I was going to be eaten by the sharks, and all I had to do was remind him that I had already lost a leg, and was incapable of losing another. He usually shut up.

I teleported into the air a hundred feet above my school, and started falling in a lazy spiral. Eventually I ended up in my room, and got changed for swimming quickly. This had been my room since two hundred years ago, and while it was truly my home, my peace here had a painful edge.

I jumped off my balcony with the feeling that everything I could do had been done, and flew off into the night. Just like Peter Pan, I wasn't getting older. But in opposition, I lived in the land of responsibility.


	6. News

_**Finally updated! :D Rate and review, this chapter is a whole whopping four pages long. I didn't include him talking to Jasper and Jacob, I think I'll do that in a flashback.**_

**Johnson**

I couldn't stop thinking about her. While I was running and jumping through the thick forest, her face was all I could see. When I attacked a stray mountain lion, her trilling chuckle drowned out the shrieks of the great cat. Is this what imprinting felt like? It was irrational, of course, because I had only seen her three times. In a cage. But Jacob always said it was a first sight thing- once you see_ her, _there was no going back.

I never understood the connection between Renesmee and Jacob. She was my neice-, half human and half vampire, and he was her husband- a wolf-man. They had always been madly in love. He had imprinted on her when she was just an infant, barley born. And they had been together ever since. I always questioned it, always wondered how they were connected on such an intimate level. And now I understood.

I couldn't stop it. She was all I could think about, all I could see, all I could hear. I _would _go back to her.

Caitlin.

Remembering her scent, I realized that it didn't make me uncomfortable; I didn't get any thirstier than I was. She smelled sweet- vampire- but at the same time, bitter- like a wolfman. And then wet and natural, like a human. She didn't smell good in a "good to eat" way. Her smell drew me in, like my scent would draw in a human.

I was euphoric.

As I whipped past a road sign, I glanced at it to check which state I was in. Massachusetts. It had only taken me an hour; I had hoped it would take more time. I needed to think.

With a sigh, I realized what I was doing. Postponing the inevitable. I needed to talk to them soon, especially Jacob and Jasper. They were the only ones who would understand- I loved my entire

lefamily, but only they could help me with this.

With a burst of speed that felt like a dagger, I shot toward New Hampshire; my home. As I neared the house of my family, I stopped to appreciate the view. We lived near the ocean in a huge stone castle- renovated by Esme, her hobby- by the ocean in the thick forest. Standing there, on one of the distant hills, I could see the towers and feel Carlisle, Emmett, Edward, Jasper and Jacob playing baseball. Esme was playing ref, and Alice, Rosalie, Bella and Renesmee were sitting nearby, chatting. Their energy radiated in the air like a thick, safe blanket. I smelled the salty sea air and the sweet, bitter woodsy smell that always lingered around our home. The sunlight reflected off the water and sparkled on my bare arms, glittering in mid-afternoon glory.

I smiled joyfully, unable to help myself. I was home.

Feeling Edward's energy, I ran toward the clearing, I thought, _It's Johnson! I'm home! _Using Edward's gift to hear his reply, I heard him think, _That's great, man. We missed you. I'll get everyone into the house; I think you want to talk? _It sounded like a question, so I quickly stopped him. _No, _I thought, _everyone is there. I'll be in the clearing in two minutes, let everyone know because we _do _need to talk._

He paused. _Is everything all right? _Edward had apparently felt the emotion in my thoughts. _You're different, Jonny._

I thought about that for a second. I didn't know how to answer without alarming him. _Edward, I'm better than all right. I'm the best I have been in two hundred years. _

He felt my joy, but didn't understand it. _I'll get them ready._

_Thanks._

I ran slower than usual; I needed to get my thoughts in order. They needed to know that I wasn't going to be around for a while, and that I would (hopefully) be better at absenting when I returned. Jacob, at least, needed to know my feelings about my helper- which in extension meant Renesmee would know and because of that, probably everyone else would find out…

_Maybe I could help, _Edward thought suggestively. I quickly used Bella's power to block him. Stupid Edward.

I decided the best way to go about it was to just tell them. I changed direction and burst into the clearing; the first thing I saw was my family- Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Bella, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Alice, Jacob and Renesmee. Seth was visiting, too, but he wasn't in the clearing. Probably stuffing his face.

Jasper felt my feelings of happiness and good humor, and raised his eyebrows.

"So, John, what have _you _been up to?" he asked jokingly. I could still sense his bewilderment even without using his gift, though. I hadn't felt like this in the entire time I had been with them.

Emmett laughed. He was always in a good mood, the lucky little… "Yeah, Jonny boy, how was hunting?" He chortled. He didn't sense any difference. Emmett was a much better hunter than I was; he always poked fun. "Catch any good… _predators?"_

But I ignored him, this time. I jumped right into what I needed to say; might as well get it over with. "I'm not… going to be around for a while," I said slowly. "Because of me? Not being… good at absenting. I'm going to get better." I sounded like an idiot. I took a deep breath, concentrating on the smell of the wolves. "I found someone who can help me. I'm not made for this." My throat hitched, remembering Riley. "I love you, but if I could undo this all I would. I didn't want this." I paused. They were all frozen. They didn't understand. "I leave at the end of the week, and when I get back… I'll be better." I looked at Carlisle, hopeful. "You won't have to worry about me anymore."

I held my breath, waiting for a reaction. A couple seconds later, it was Alice that broke the silence. "Johnson Xavier!" she exclaimed. "What is this? I can't see _anything_ in your future!" Alice can see the future; she got pissed when she was blind. She glared at me, then asked, "Are you doing something with the wolves? Oh my gosh," she exclaimed suddenly, "you're running away again! You're going to Forks with Seth, aren't you!" Behind me, Seth whined uneasily. Apparently he had no idea, either.

I glared at her and muttered, "I'll tell you later." She still looked unhappy, but went silent and nodded.

Carlisle took a step forward. "What happened, Johnson?" he asked. I just looked at him. I explained again. "I met somebody… somebody powerful, who can help me resist humans." I pleaded with my eyes, and he took the cue. He turned toward everyone. "Okay, I'm going to talk to John. Please, you can all talk to him later." I smiled gratefully. Carlisle was somebody who could be counted on. He was my true father.

He and Esme herded me to the back corner as the rest of the family dissolved into separate groups, muttering quietly and shooting looks in my direction. Esme gathered me in her arms and firmly, but sadly, asked, "What are you doing to me, Johnson?" I looked into her warm amber eyes and sadly said, "The right thing. Isn't that what we do?"

She just stared at me. "When you came here and adopted us, Johnson Xavier Pinnelly, it was one of the happiest days of my life." She smiled bravely. "You look exactly like Riley. His death…" She didn't have the words. "Has haunted me. He was so young." She gripped my hand. "_You_ are so young. But you came and made things right- I'm not haunted anymore. If he was darkness, then you are light. You _will_ do the right thing." She squeezed my hand once more, then walked gracefully over to the rest of my family. She was truly my mother, and I would miss her more than anything.

I turned to Carlisle. "I may not come back for a while." My throat caught. "I'll miss you… I'll miss everyone." He just looked at me, as well. Then he laughed suddenly and said, "Esme said it all! We'll miss you too, John. Come back as soon as you can." He leaned in farther and said, "You leave at the end of the week, right?" I nodded. "Stay with us the entire time. We like having you around, Johnson."

I looked into his large amber eyes. "Don't worry, I-" I had been about to say "I wouldn't leave if I didn't have the prospect of getting better" but I would have. In a heartbeat. "Carlisle," I said, "I think I'm in love…" He looked questionably at me. "The girl, that's going to help me? She's… special." I felt light and warm. "I can't stop thinking about her. I think I love her." He looked at me and said simply, "We'll talk later. Say hello to your family first." And he swept me over to them. There was no escape.

********************************************************************

I looked at the stars. They were pretty tonight. It made me happier to know that Caitlin could see the same stars.

I hoped Riley could see them too, wherever he is.

"Johnson, why did you disappear?" she asked at one point. I looked at her and saw the worry in her eyes. I could trust Alice with my life; she was the sister I had always loved without even knowing it.

"The one helping me… I'm in love with her." She groaned, "And she's one of those odd half breeds that I _can't see, _right?"

"No… not a _half _breed…" She heard the emphasis on my words and gasped.

"What is she?"

I squirmed uncomfortably. "Well… she's not supposed to exist…" Alice was blank. "Vampire, human, and werewolf. _True _werewolf, not the shape-shifters," I mumbled quickly. Alice froze.

"Wow. Is that… Is that possible?"

"Apparently. And… she's powerful."

Her eyes narrowed. "Powerful _how?" _

"Oh… well… powerful in a way that I think she could be quite a match for us. And the Denali clan. And the Washington wolves…" My voice trailed off. "And the Volturi," I whispered.

Alice's eyes bugged out in fear. "Um…" was all she could say. Then she gathered her voice and said, "Johnson, I don't think you should go back."

I looked at her. Then I threw back my head and laughed, laughed so the trees shook and the animals ran. "Alice!" I laughed. "I don't think I can _not _go back!" I laughed some more. "And truly, she offered her help to me." I was still chuckling when she answered.

"John-john…" She used her name for me. I quieted down and really listened to her. Her forehead was creased in worry- worry about me. "Why can't you stay? Did she do something to you?" Anger was bubbling in her voice. I quickly set her strait.

"No, Alice… See, if vampires could imprint, I would be imprinted."

She looked at me sadly. "That bad, huh?" I nodded.

Alice sighed. She looked at her foot in the sand, then at me. "Make good choices, Johnson." I thanked her with my eyes. She smiled.

"I need to talk to Jasper and Jacob."

"Race you back to the house."

She darted into the forest.


	7. Sleep

**Caitlin**

_What if he doesn't come back?_

That question had haunted me since the beginning of the week. What if? What if, what if, what if? Part of me wanted him to return. _Hungered _for it. A part of me felt like my entire life depended on his arrival.

Another part… wasn't so optimistic.

Another part felt like my entire life was _at stake. _Not my life, particularly, but everyone else's. And if one couldn't die, but had nothing to live for… Well, what could I do? My distraction could mean the murder of many hybrids and humans.

So no, it wasn't my directly my life I feared for. It was my people. In extension, my sanity, as well.

On the day of his arrival, I was a wreck. I had to skip classes and just fly around Boston all day. I flew into birds and buildings, drifted down toward the water and plunged in. Back at the school, I knocked people over and blew up a bench out of surprise. I made a flood in the front hallway and grew vines from the rafters of the second floor dorm.My teachers, for their part, were pissed by the afternoon.

"Caitlin!" they would yell. I would jump, and something else unintentional would happen. "Fix it, now. This was unnecessary." And I always would. Jason wondered why I don't just tell them to shove it, since I was in control of them, but I just said I chose to be seventeen for a reason. Authority was for a time and place only.

That night, after I had fixed the school, I nervously flew out into the forest. I was wearing baggy pants again, because a fake leg could show weakness to him. Who knew what he would think? It wasn't like I showed it to just anybody.

After wandering for half an hour or so, I decided to just go to the clearing where I had seen him for the first time. He would probably think the same thing, since it was the only part of the grounds he knew.

I made it to the clearing in record time. He wasn't there.

My heart sank.

As I started hyperventilating , my brain screamed, _You stupid girl! You irrational, starstruck teenager. No wonder you chose seventeen. You are acting like a puppy that was fed and wants more. You aren't fit to run an entire underground civilization… _It was hard, but I tried to ignore the constant stream of self-criticism. Instead, I searched deep into my mind for the tiny, rational sliver of common sense that I relied on in a crisis. It was telling me not to be stupid, and check the time.

I did. It was only 5:00. He wouldn't be here yet.

I sighed with relief. I really had thought he wouldn't come. The anxious feeling in my chest made me realize how much bigger the part hoping he would come was than the part saying it was a bad idea.

I was dumbstruck. So Sam was right.

Sitting in the middle of the clearing, I realized how tired I was. Thinking about it, my rational sliver of brain reminded me that he wouldn't be here for a while.

I laid on the ground; it was cool how the vampire and werewolf in me made this comfortable. Laying on my back, looking at the darkened, setting sky, I thought about how impossibly happy I was. Still in pain, of course, but the thought of making life less miserable for someone else made me happy. That was one reason I fit so well into this role in life; happiness made me happy.

Thinking about happiness, and the beautiful, never ending sky, I drifted off to sleep.

**Johnson**

When I got to the clearing, she was laying on the ground, fast asleep. My breath caught. Words did not describe.

I never understood how Edward could watch Bella sleep when she was human. Now I knew.

I took a deep breath of her scent. Quietly, so as not to disturb her slumber, I sat cross legged on the ground.

**Caitlin**

When I sleep, I usually don't dream. Even when I was a human, dreams were not a huge part of my sleep. But that night, I dreamt of Johnson.

Epiphanies weren't common for me; I usually avoided anything that would give me false hope. But in my dream, I was with him, and we were happy. We were with a large group, but because I didn't have any smell in my dream, I couldn't tell what they were. Their faces were clouded and dark, but somehow I could feel the joy they all felt. I was sure things were going to be okay.

And then I woke up. I didn't know where I was for about two seconds, and was disorientated. Then I saw him.

I instantly flipped back and curled into a defensive crouch. A snarl rumbled through my lips. I was pretty sure I looked like a true horror movie monster.

Then I realized who it was. I immediately straitened up and crossed my arms. I glared.

"Jesus, you could have woken me up."

He couldn't glare back. He was staring at me with awe written all across his face. His eyes shone with a true joy. "I didn't want to. You looked so happy." He was just as beautiful as I remembered, and for a second I remembered my dream. Everything was going to be all right.

But I was startled. "How long have you been watching me? And how did you not attack me?" I asked when the idea occurred. He chuckled.

"I had a revelation."

I wasn't sure what he meant by that, but I would find out later. I kneeled on the ground and stretched. "Have you hunted?"

His eyes were an amazing golden honey. I took that as a yes.

After stretching one more time, I clapped my hands. "Let's get down to business."

For the first time since I had met him, he looked truly nervous. I could sort of understand him- he had no idea what we were going to do. Really, I didn't either.

He cleared his throat. "What… what, exactly, are we going to be doing?" I considered this. I had several ideas, but nothing was concrete. I sort of thought we would plan as we went along. But one thing was for certain.

"I'm going to synthesize a human aroma. It will be weak at first, but I'm going to make it stronger and stronger till I know how much you can take." I shrugged my shoulders. "Then I'll do the same with animals. Herbivores first, but it will get more carnivorous till I know what you can't resist the most. From there, I'll make the human smell a permanent cloud around you and get a couple animals within a two mile radius. The goal is to ignore the human smell and get to the animal." I checked his reaction. "I've already told my family to stay out of the woods, so no problem there." He looked ok, but raised his hand. Like a little kid.

I fought back a smile. "Yes?"

"How long will I have to do this?"

"You will have to do this till you can go into the town down there thirsty. And _not_ attack people."

He whistled. "Okay then." He took a deep breath. "Ready when you are."

I was ready.


	8. Pain Tale

**Johnson**

For over seven hours, we worked at building my endurance. Caitlin thought I was doing well, and I did too. She really was great- she made it smell exactly like humans. Although, she was surprised I could resist so strong a scent at the first try. I wasn't sure if that was a compliment or an insult.

But we did need a break at some point. I collapsed on the ground next to her.

She turned to me, weariness in her eyes. "Johnson, you're doing amazing." She looked confused, though.

"What's up?"

She blanched. "Up? Nothing's up, why do you ask?" She said it in a rush; like she was scared.

I rolled my eyes. "You are confused, probably wondering something about me. So. What's up?"

Hesitantly, she murmured, "I couldn't help reading your mind. Um… Why do you think you weren't made to be a vampire?" I froze up. This was a question I hadn't anticipated.

She saw me freeze, and said hurriedly, "You don't have to answer, it's not important, I don't need to know…" but I stopped her.

"No. I want you to know." I took a deep breath. "It's just kind of painful And it's a very, very long story." She nodded. "Only if you want to tell me, Johnson, I'll listen." So after another deep breath, I began my story.

"When I was human, I had a brother. An identical twin. His name was Riley; Riley Joseph Pinnelly. He and I… were close. Inseparable. We were born together, and we grew up together. And, in some ways, we died together.

"Riley and I were closer than you could imagine. We told each other everything, and went to each other for advice. It wasn't like we didn't love our parents, or older sister, but we trusted each other more than anyone else in the world. We had sort of an empathy link, only it was one way- I always knew what he was doing, and feeling; he didn't. The only thing we shared was thought.

"This went on till we were both eighteen, in 2006. It started right after our birthday, on May 27. Riley had been gone a lot, and we were talking less. Or, you could say, we were _saying _less. He didn't trust me as much as he did before, and was thinking about leaving. He would sneak out late at night while I was asleep, so I wouldn't bust him, and come back right before I woke up. His mood went down, and he became depressed and angry at our family. He ate less and was scared and crabby all the time.

"This went on for four months. When his thoughts would slip, I discovered that he was always with a woman named Victoria. I could tell from his thoughts that she was dangerous. She was using him, and he was following her blindly. I was so worried about him that one day, while we were home alone, I confronted him about it. I asked him why he was doing this to us- to _me-_ and reminded him that I was always there for him. I reminded him that we were still his family, and we all still loved him.

"He got upset. For the first time in our life, he _punched _me. We had never fought before. But when I asked him, pleaded with him to tell me what was up, he flat-out went into a rage. He screamed that it was none of my business, and that if I was smart I would leave him alone. He stormed out of our house in a fit of hate and sadness. I tried to stop him with my thoughts, but he would just think of hateful things. Eventually, I sank to the couch and just hoped for him.

"I sat and watched for hours. Through Riley's thoughts, I saw he was going to Victoria. She was with other people. They were all talking for a while, and Riley was scared out of his mind, even though he was trying to hide it. I tried to coax him back with my head, but he was ignoring me. I had never felt so helpless… I didn't know what to do. I could only sit and watch."

My eyes were blank, remembering. Caitlin's face was twisted in pain, which I'm sure was a mirror of my own. I continued my story.

"At one point, Victoria asked Riley if he was ready. I had no idea what she meant, but apparently Riley did. His fear was stronger than ever, but he said yes, he was. Riley always acted brave, no matter what.

"And then they pounced. All three of them jumped on my brother, my beloved twin, and held him down as Victoria knelt over him. 'My dear Riley, your time is up' is what she said. I ran toward my front door, still watching. She laughed, and then bit him. In the neck.

"When this happened, I was running out on my porch. I heard his scream, ran into my parents, and blacked out."

I shuddered. Caitlin looked horrified. But I couldn't stop, that wasn't the end of my story.

"For what felt like years, I laid in my bed, withering. I guess my parents brought me inside, I'll never know. It was horrible not only because of the unimaginable pain, but the feeling that I had no idea what was going on. And why should I have? Riley had never told me, never thought of it. I always thought we shared everything, but I guess I was wrong- Riley was a better actor than I gave him credit for. I don't know why I turned into a vampire without being bitten; probably because my connection to him was stronger was stronger than his to me. If it had been me that was bitten, maybe I would have turned into a vampire and not Riley.

"I realized that in time, it was getting better. I still didn't know why I was in pain, but it was slowly subsiding. My last memory of the pain was when I moaned, 'Mom'. Then I heard their footsteps, so much clearer than I ever had before. I opened my eyes and saw the beautiful faces of my mom, dad and sister in perfect clarity. I was so confused. All I wanted was them to tell me what was going on.

"Then I smelled them."

It seemed like I was going to explode. This was the hardest thing to remember; the one thing I wanted to forget but never forgive myself for.

"I was so thirsty; it felt like my throat was on fire. I didn't know why, and I didn't know how I was so much more fluent than before. All I knew was that I needed something, and they smelled like what I needed."

I was so sad, so full of hate for myself. This was the exact feeling I had been trying to avoid for a long time now. Caitlin would hate me, would truly think I was a monster. Then I looked at her, full of sympathy and sadness for me, and the world was a better place. She wasn't the accuser, she was the savior.

"After… _that, _I wandered around the country, desperately looking for something. Answers, my brother, another one of my kind. Anything. I fed whenever I was thirsty, hating myself for it. All those people… I was still human in many ways. Then I found James Craw.

"He was another vampire, and when he realized what happened to me, he gave me the answers I needed. He explained everything to me, calmed me down. He became my first friend in that life. James hated feeding off of humans as much as I did, and sympathized the means by which I became a vampire. He agreed to help me find Riley.

"We found out by word of mouth that there was a war brewing in Washington. Tons of newborn vampires were being created in Seattle, led by a woman with red hair. I recognized this as Victoria, because I was still connected to Riley- even though he was not in any way connected to me. We set off to find him. And one day we did.

"Riley was still blindly following Victoria. He was still scared, and unsure about what was happening around him. But he did whatever she said, nonetheless. She convinced him that she loved him, and he believed her. So it was hard to catch them away from each other, but when we did, I took my chance.

"Riley was shocked to see me as a vampire. I explained how it happened, and his face grew worn with understanding. He apologized, and I punched him in the face." I smiled. "I told him it was to get him back for hitting me, and that I was sick of his shit. I expected him to come with me, and he said no.

"They were going to attack a family of vampires- the Cullens, who are now my family. I didn't know them then, though. I begged and pleaded with Riley to come with me, so he wouldn't be in fear anymore. But he said that he was in love with Victoria, and he couldn't leave; he had a job to do. I tried everything I could. He was rigid. Then I told him about… about eating our family, and he went blank. He was uncertain. I was so scared of what he would do. But then he shook his head and said, 'That doesn't change things. She is my family now,' but he still seemed uncertain. I hoped that was enough to at least make him rethink things.

"So I gave him James' cell number, hugged him hard, and said, 'I still love you, man. There's still time.' And then I left.

"I kept watching him through his thoughts. I was so worried. On the day they were to attack the Cullens, James and I decided to watch, to make sure he would be okay. We were hiding out on a cliff. And then I made a noise…" This was another hard part for me. James was my friend, no matter what.

"I made a noise, and they saw us. Victoria darted to the cliffs we were hiding on, and was up in an instant. James was lower than me, so even though we both ran… he didn't have a chance. She caught him and I heard a metallic ripping sound, and the last words he ever said were, 'Run! Don't stop! He'll be okay!' And I did. God, I am such a coward. I should have stayed and helped him…" My voice trailed off. "But I didn't. And he's gone.

"Anyway, when this happened we were outside Port Angeles. I ran up to Canada and hid right over the border, coward that I am." I was disgusted with myself. "I listened and watched the battle through Riley's eyes. At one point he and Victoria snuck off into the forest, and I thought they were running away to safety. Truth be told, I was relieved. I thought he was really going to be okay, even if it was out of cowardice.

"Then I saw where they were going through Riley's thoughts. They were going to kill Bella- I had no idea who she was, except that she was human and the object of Victoria's wrath. I felt sorry for her anyway, because I knew how cruel Victoria was.

"Then, when he got to where she was, I saw who was in the clearing with Bella- a male vampire and a werewolf. That was bad- they could kill my brother- and the male was telling Riley that Victoria didn't love him. I started running, at that point. He had been suspecting this for a long time now, and his assurance was making him uneasy. He was unfocused. He was unsafe, and I loved him too much to let him die alone.

"Then the werewolf attacked him, and he stopped thinking- he just fought. Fought for all he was worth. I was almost there, and then I felt a horrible pain everywhere on my body. For the first time in my entire life, I felt completely alone." I looked at her, feeling like a monster.

"I went into depression after that. I had never been without my brother. For a year and a half, all I did was sit there near the border. I didn't want this life forced upon me, so I didn't eat anything; I was trying to starve myself to death. Anytime a hiker or something would come close, I would go crazy and feed. I was trying not to feel or think. I missed Riley so much. Even when he was crazy with lust for Victoria, and going through a tough time, I loved him still. He was the one person I couldn't live without, and there I was, unable to die." I smiled. "Yeah, I sound like I'm talking about a girlfriend or something." But she shook her head.

"Any more?" she asked. I thought about that. "Yes," I finally answered.

"As I said, I was stuck in a deep depression. I didn't eat or think; I just sat there and let… _myself_ slowly die away.

"Then one day, as I was… just sitting there, I smelled another vampire in the woods. He stepped into my sight long before he realized it, and as soon as he noticed me, he sank into a crouch and snarled. I recognized him. He was the male vampire protecting Bella. He snarled at me, 'What are _you _doing? Seth killed you. You are dead.' I looked at him and said the first words I had said in years. 'No. My brother is dead.' It was like I was finally accepting it. I felt something, for the first time in weeks. Anger. 'You and your vampire friends killed my brother. _My brother. _My brother, who I loved more than anything in the world.' It was sort of pathetic, actually. I started sobbing into my hands.

"He didn't understand what was going on, but after a while I realized he was speaking. _Oh my god, I have to get him to Carlisle. Can vampires go into shock? I don't know what to do… _I tried to console him. 'It's okay; it's just still hard on me.' He looked at me like I was crazy. He made me come with him to his house in Forks, where he had his father- Carlisle, who is now sort of my father- talk to me. He said yes, they did kill him. But it was out of defense, even though that's a pathetic excuse. He admitted to it. Carlisle offered me another chance- a chance not to be a monster, a chance at family again. I took it. I needed it. And slowly, they helped me forgive- but I never forgot.

"The Cullens helped me figure out that I had a very potent gift- I could use the power of any vampire close enough to me. Any vampire..." I looked at her. "But not you.

"Anyway, they were truly a family to me, even though I didn't deserve it. I didn't eat anything, unless a human got too close, for a full hundred and fifty years. I was too bitter. Then I thought about Esme's face when I came home, my raw hatred for my glowing red eyes, and what Riley would think of this opportunity. That was what made me stop, fifty years ago. But…" I hesitated. "I've only really been trying for that last fifteen years or so. And only really succeeding tonight. I am a very weak person."

I took a deep, shameful breath. I didn't deserve the compassionate, sympathetic creature sitting across from me. She should have left when she first saw me, should have run screaming and then gone on with her life. But she didn't. Surly she would now.

Instead, she leaned over and took my hand. She gave it a gentle squeeze. "Johnson, you are stronger than anybody else I have ever met in my life. You admitted to me that you needed help, and you are accepting and working with it. That is strength."

I took this in. "Thank you, Caitlin. You have no idea how badly I needed to hear that."

I looked at her and, for the first time since Riley died, I was truly at peace.


	9. Love Story

**Caitlin**

I have to admit, I was nervous. Johnson had just told me a deeply personal, painful, don't share with just anyone kind of story. I had one too. But I didn't know if I could tell it.

"Caitlin… Why are you in pain all the time?" It was an abrupt question, one that I didn't know how to answer at all. I decided to try my best.

I wasn't sure how to start. "Remember when you asked me why I was so much more powerful than any others of my kind?"He nodded. "Well… I think I can tell you. It's another long story; it's the same story.

"One day, in the summer of 2009, I was really bored. I had nothing to do at all. So, I took a walk. Instead of staying in my neighborhood, I decided to go bike into the next town over. I remember thinking it would be cooler when I got there, so I put on a hoodie and jeans.

"I got on my bike and started off. When I was almost at the town, I smelled smoke. My dad was firefighter, so I knew the difference between barbeque and house fires. It was a house fire. It didn't look too bad when I stopped my bike, but I had to call 911- save the house and all that. I thought, 'I should stay and make sure they arrive. Don't get too close.' Then I heard a voice from inside the fire calling for help.

"It was a kid, a little boy. I found out later his name was Trevor McKinney. He was seven years old and home alone, when the house caught on fire. I didn't think about my own safety, all I could think was that the kid was going to die if someone didn't help. So I pulled my sleeves over my hands and ran into the house. The fire was worse than I had thought…

"I called for him and knocked on every door. Eventually I found him curled up in a closet, and coaxed him out. By this time the fire was really working, and even though it felt like hours, it only took two minutes. I ran out of the room, carrying the kid, and down the hall, looking for the stairs. But I made a wrong step.

"I fell through the floor, into another fire. While I was falling, I curled my body around him to make sure he didn't get burned. It worked- he didn't get burned, but I did. My right sleeve and right pant leg caught fire, and even though I was pretty panicked, all I could think was, 'Get the kid out!' So, on fire, I ran outside and dropped him on the ground. He was safe. I, meanwhile, was on fire, and had inhaled so much smoke that I couldn't move. I dropped to the ground and passed out.

"I went into a coma. When I woke up- I found out later that I had been out for three weeks- my right arm was badly scarred and my right leg was… gone." Slowly, I pulled the right sleeve of my shirt up to my elbow. Then I pulled the right leg of my sweatpants up. Johnson sucked in a breath. "Caitlin…" He seemed at a loss for words. "I'm so sorry."

I shrugged bitterly. "It gets worse. The doctor told me it was a good thing I was wearing sleeves and pants, or else I might have lost both my legs and arms.

"I also found out that Trevor was okay, and asked to see him. When he did, he was shocked. The poor kid held himself personally responsible, and refused to leave my side for hours. He was more affected by it than I was! We never lost touch. Trevor eventually went into depression. It was horrible…

"Then, about a week after I woke up, I started doing things. Things I could never do before. Water would appear where I wanted it, animals would do what I wanted. Electricity came out of my fingertips. That sort of thing- I realize now that that was when I started getting my powers.

"And I was healing. My scars looked months, not weeks, old, and all the cuts I received were completely gone. Within two weeks it was like I had had the injuries for years. But I had to act the part of an injured girl, because that's what I was. Thankfully, they gave me a customized prosthetic anyway.

"I kept receiving these little powers and getting more scared for two months. I tried to hide it, tried to deny that it was happening, but what happens if you don't channel your power is it starts to hurt. It feels like your insides are getting chewed on and boiled and acid scrubbed, all at the same time. I had to channel the energy in private, or someone would find out- and make my life hell. I would be a freak show, a science experiment to be on display. I thought it was just me, that I was the only one with weird powers like this. So I had no idea what to do. I thought I would have to tough it out alone.

"I went on like this for months. Whenever I was alone, I would channel all my energy into this strange new power. It was raw and undisciplined, and usually it would leave damage to wherever I was. It was the worst time of my life- no, scratch that. I've had a lot of low points.

"Then my uncle died. He and I were really close and he had been sick his entire life. He wasn't supposed to live past 20, but he was 48… I shouldn't have been surprised. But I was crushed. I came home one day, and all my energy was bottled up. They told me, and… I let it go. A huge burst of lightning exploded from my body, and it was like an earthquake. My parents were horrified. I knew they would always love me, but to keep them safe, I had to leave. I couldn't, though. It was like I was more in tune with my powers. I wiped their memories, made them forget all about it. I faked like I didn't know what happened either.

"But even then, I knew I still had to leave. While I was home alone one day, I recorded a message on the computer. 'Mom, Dad, and all my brothers and sisters. I love you. I will always love you and I have always loved you. But I'm going through some tough stuff right now, and… it's not safe to be around you anymore. Not safe for you. I'm dangerous now. I will come back someday, when it's safe. When I'm in control. I'm not happy about this, but remember: I'm safe, and now you're safe. I will always be watching. And I will come back, someday. Until then… Love you.'" My throat was tightening. I remembered the words like I had recorded them yesterday.

"I left, not sure where to go. I needed somewhere secluded, where no one would wander around. Somewhere where I could hone my power and channel it safely. I was in New York, but I had a lot of relatives in Canada- and one of them had a cabin in Alaska. I set off., and arrived in two days- I could fly. That was the only part of the power I enjoyed.

"For months, I stayed in Alaska and trained. I taught myself how to use every power I had, and discovered that the more I ate, the less sleep I needed. I could eat vampire style- but would only on animals- or human style. So I split it between both.

"I wasn't happy. I figured I would never be happy again, but to keep others safe, I needed to stay up there. Regardless, I was as peaceful as I could manage- I was trying not to feel anything at all.

"Then three others of my kind came to my little haven. Their names were Logan, Clarissa and Mei Wing- in fact, Logan is immortal and still a good friend of mine. They told me that they had a school, a home for others of my kind- there were many more. We were the most secretive beings on the planet; that's why I knew nothing about them. I read their minds, and found pure truth in everything they said. So I agreed to go to give it a shot.

"On the plane ride to Boston, they sat in the cockpit and whispered. I don't think they realized I could hear them, but they were talking about me- they were saying things like, 'I think she's the one' and 'Maybe Roland was right, the most powerful in history.' I had no idea what they were talking about, but I was tired- it had been two weeks since I had slept. So I stopped listening.

"When we got there, I stepped off the plane and felt immediately at peace. It felt like all the energy bottled up inside me for the last year was free in the air, floating like a fuzzy safe blanket all around me. I saw the faces of all the other hybrid people, and even though I had never seen them in my life, it was like greeting old friends. I was home.

"After meeting Roland- the principle, I guess you could say- I got settled into a room. They gave me my own, because of how powerful I was. Power sort of equals privacy. They wanted to make me take some lessons, practice controlling my power first, but I was so tired of being alone. I wanted to be around people. So they gave me a schedule, and the next day I went to class." I smiled. "This is right about when my life took a turn for the better.

"Through the school, I met a guy named Brian Ooman. It was weird- I saw him once and knew he was special. I wanted to know him better. He and I talked, and became good friends, and then one day weeks later he asked me if I wanted to go somewhere with him. We flew to New York City- Brian could shape shift into any animal- and went to the top of a skyscraper. We just watched the sunset. This was significant because that was the night I realized I loved him.

"When we got back the next day, I was called to Roland's office. He sat me down and explained that I was more powerful than anyone else of our kind. As long as another one of our kind had a power, I had the same power. Once they died, I didn't have the power anymore. I can only die if I have no bloodline- so to kill me, you would have to kill my kid. I wasn't sure what to make of that. I was happy in my new home, and in love. I just wanted to continue being.

"I thanked him for explaining, and went to class. He was baffled that I took it so well, but I don't think he realized that everything was perfect- I had friends, I was safe, I was happy, my family was safe. Everything was in place.

"Life went on as normal for many years- I perfected my powers, I stayed with Brian, I grew closer to my friends. I also helped protect our way of life, got good grades, defended my people… I was happy. On the night of my twentieth birthday, Brian and I went to our special place on the skyscraper. He asked me to marry him. It was perfect, of course I said yes. I loved him more than anyone else in the world.

"That was when I decided it was time to see my family. A week later, I called and we visited- I couldn't tell them any about hybrids, but it was great to see them again. I got to see everyone, and told them about the wedding." I had tears in my eyes. "MY dad got to walk me down the aisle, and my sisters were my bridesmaids. They made everything perfect.

"Brian and I could both grow up, and spent sixty three years together (hybrids live, on average, 121 years). One day, while we were in New York, Brian was shot. I don't know why, and I don't know who shot him, but they killed him." My voice was bitter and hard, seeped with sadness. "So that's why I'm always hurting. I can't live without him, and I can't die. I'm stuck in a miserable piece of hate in between. I don't make lasting relationships anymore, because…" My sadness was seeping through. "I can make friends close as I want to. But no matter what I do, they are going to die. So it's not worth it. I want to find the sonofabitch that shot my husband. But I can't put the rest of my people in danger like that." My voice broke. "I miss him so much.

"The only way for me to die is to have a baby, and then have the baby killed. Eliminate my bloodline, and I'm gone. But I won't put a child in constant danger like that, and… and I love Brian too much to do that to him."

This time, it was Johnson that consoled me. He sat next to me, put his arm around me. "It's ok, Caitlin. He misses you too." _I know that, _I wanted to say. I found, though, that being with Johnson dampened my sadness. He was like Brian in so many ways…

"Caitlin…" he murmured into my hair. "Whatever happened to Trevor?" I laughed a short, humorless, angry laugh.

"Trevor died when he was fifteen. He thought my life, and how he assumed it turned out, was because of him. Poor kid… He died with a bullet in the brain. Shot himself."

Johnson sat in stunned silence. "Wow. That's… horrible."

"I just hope they're both happy now. They deserve it." Somehow, impossibly, I was happy. Not an ecstatic, natural happy, but what I was beginning to call a Johnson happy. It was unfamiliar, and made me uneasy, but was somehow pleasant.

I gasped. Sam was right. I was falling in love.


	10. Jeep

**Johnson**

We sat there in peaceful silence for a while after that. Somehow, impossibly, I was content. It felt so good to share my heartbreak with someone- and Caitlin was a perfect listener. Unlike my family, Caitlin didn't try to tell me everything was alright. It wasn't, and she knew it just like I knew it. Bypass the bullshit.

But besides that, something was bothering me. Before that talk, I had sort of thought Caitlin was shallow. Not hugely, but just a little bit smug and superior. I never gave myself time to really figure out her depth. When I found out that Caitlin was a caring, compassionate, selfless person who would give everything she has to keep others safe, it baffled me. Vampires, by nature, are not caring creatures. Self-preservation is always the most important trait in a fight. Humans are the same way. Being around Caitlin was strange, because I wasn't used to her selflessness. It was infectious, too. I felt strong around her; like even I could run into a fire to save a kid. Like I _would_, if I had too. It also worked in reverse- being around Caitlin was safe. She was a security blanket, a guardian angel, a watchman. I was almost jealous of her kind; she watched out for all of them. It must have been wonderful.

And then something triggered worry in my mind. "Caitlin," I asked, "what did you mean when you said 'we could both grow older'?" She only looked seventeen. Was there a way to grow old?

But she just chuckled. "I grew old with Brian. Then, when he died, I decided to go back and keep watching out for my people. This is how I looked when I was almost nineteen, and since I want to look almost nineteen, that's how it is." Teasing, she said, "I also am enrolled in high school- I've been through it nine times. Wanna know how my grades are?"

I just laughed, still shaken but my fears- and hopes- gone. "Nah, I'm sure mine would be better." I leaned forward. "So tell me about this school, Caitlin. It sounds great- like everyone is there." No, more than great- it sounded perfect. Wonderful.

Caitlin smiled, filled with true excitement. Her love for her people was obvious on her face. "It is the perfect place for those who don't want to be found. Or, those who need to stay hidden. We don't need to hide, and we get all the attention and help we need. No cover stories, no secrets, no lies. The only cover story we ever need is that it's Gregory T. School of the Gifted, for those with 'attention disorders and hyperactivity issues.'" She snorted good-naturedly. "Or, as we call it, Freak School. We take anyone with powers; they can be runaways or orphans. Sometimes, if the hybrid in question is too powerful but doesn't know it, we send a 'scout'- someone to go to their house and tell them 'we have an opening, come learn here.' Or, scouts to come looking for you, like how they found me.

"Everyone learns the basics- math, science, English, social studies. Then we have the choice of electives- home ec, music, art, that kind of thing. We also all take- and master- judo and krav maga, in case someone figures out how to neutralize our powers." She said this so normally, like everyone did it. I guess they did in her world, but I was baffled. She looked so breakable. "Everyone also has to train at least thirty hours in our hologram gym, and take at least two languages." She smiled with true happiness. "It's the best. It's the one place in the world we will never have to hide."

I felt a strange, hollow pang in my stomach. It sounded like my home, but there were no schools for vampires. Vampires aren't there for each other, besides my family. Vampires live by the rule "every man for himself." This life had no unity.

Suddenly, Caitlin's head snapped up. "Back to work." I sighed. _This is good for you, this is good for you_, I kept telling myself. But all I wanted to do was talk to her, get to know her. I wanted to be with her.

"Okiedokie, m'am. " I stood strait in mock salute. She rolled her eyes, and the woods were suddenly filled with the smell of humans. I took a deep breath and ran into the forest in search of the animals. When I got back to the clearing, her face was held in a strange way- pride and improvement and worry mixed together. But when I stopped, all she said was, "Again."

We kept at it all day. Caitlin's facial expression didn't change much through the entire course, and she didn't say much. We finally flopped down back in the same old clearing in exhaustion.

Caitlin changed a rock into a pizza, and silently began to eat. I watched her instead of speaking; one thing I already knew was that she told me what she wanted, when she wanted. After ten minutes of silence, Caitlin unexpectedly said, "Tell me about your family, Johnson."

This caught me off guard. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything. Hobbies, histories- the works."

I took a minute to figure out what I was going to say. "Well… I live with ten other people. My family- Edward and Esme, my 'parents', Rosalie and Emmett, Alice and Jasper, Edward and Bella- they're my brothers and sisters. Then my niece, Renesmee- Edward and Bella's daughter- and her husband, Jacob. Renesmee is half human, half vampire and Jacob is a wolfman." I paused. "It's sort of funny- Jacob was in love with Bella up until she had her daughter, then Jacob imprinted on Renesmee. He always knew he was supposed to be family." I looked at her again. She was on lying on her back, hands behind her head, eyes closed. She looked peaceful.

Caitlin noticed my stop in talking and prodded with a "Go on. What about hobbies?"

So, I did. "Well. Everyone is over two hundred years old, and as you guessed everyone has a hobby. Carlisle works in medicine- he's a doctor. Esme is into home decorating- she actually renovated our home. Rosalie- blonde and beautiful- like mechanics! It's crazy. Emmett…" This was difficult. Everything, really. "Emmett likes danger. Whatever puts him at risk- fighting, gambling, extreme sports. You name it. Jasper likes computer and web programming. Alice adores fashion and party planning. Edward loves music- composing, collecting, and study. Bella reads and writes like there's no tomorrow. Renesmee cooks! It's sort of cute, actually. Jacob likes the outdoors. He's the only one who really doesn't have a specific hobby. Hmm…" No one left. "Well, that's my whole family in hobbies. Anything else?"

She looked at me strangely. "What do you do, Johnson?"

"Me? Architectural design. It's the best."

She looked happy. "Hmm. Cool."

"Caitlin, what about you? What do you do?"

She blushed. "Well… I love art. Especially sculpting- clay is my favorite medium." She yawned.

I sighed. "Caitlin, you should sleep." I hated it; every second away from her was like torture. But she was so tired!

Caitlin was reluctant, but mumbled, "Yeah, you're right… I have no energy at all." She yawned again, and pulled out a small cell. "Laycee? Yeah, could you come pick me up? NO, don't you dare take my car… I don't know, take Jason's, he won't mind." She bit back a smirk. "The keys are in his room. Thanks so much!" She hung up, then turned to me. "Laycee has a really useful power- she knows where anyone is at any time." She rolled her eyes. "Of course, she lusts after my car, but there's no way she's driving it through the woods. Now Jason's Jeep, it's perfect for that…" Again, she bit back a grin. "Where were we?"

God, she was sweet. "What kind of car do you have?" I was morbidly curious, now, and it would be a great story to pass on to Rosalie. Her eyes glossed over; a dreamy expression covered her face. "It's my dream car, a 1963 Austin Mini Cooper. I just had it repainted by a friend- purple with cream and black stripes. It's the best car ever, and even though Laycee has a green Porsche, it's at her house in Oxford, PA. She's sent here, by her parents. There is no way she's taking my car on a drive through the woods, but Jason's Jeep is perfect for that." She tried not to smile for the third time.

I couldn't stand it anymore. "Why is the subject of his Jeep so funny?" It was killing me. I almost tapped my foot out of impatience.

She started laughing. "Let's just say, we don't bet against Sam anymore." She couldn't stop laughing. I wasn't sure why, but at that moment I felt completely whole. Like losing everything hadn't taken the effect it really had. "You'll see, just look at the west end of the clearing."

Still laughing, I turned toward where she was looking. I heard the roaring of a big engine, and suddenly saw why she was laughing so hard. Me, I couldn't stop. The car was monstrous, and had a great build, but it was pink. Bright, Pepto-Bismol, little-girl ribbons, bubblegum pink- and the owner was a self-respecting male. I was laughing so hard I was shaking.

Two bright, curious blue eyes were staring at me through the windshield- that must have been Laycee. I quieted down, raised my hand in a half-greeting, and turned back to Caitlin, suddenly unsure.

She was unbothered, of course. At least by that. "Do you want to stay at the mansion?" Huh. There wasn't much I could do up there, and I had no idea what they would all think of me. So I shook my head. "You know, I don't sleep and all… Thanks for asking." She yawned and nodded. "Same time tomorrow then, Johnny-boy." Emmett's name was strangely natural coming from her. I smiled and turned around, walking back into the forest.

She got into the truck, and they drove off.


	11. How to Save a Life

_**Ok, it's a stretch, but I love this song more than muffins(: I had to weasel it in somehow!**_

_**And in case I never said before, I own nothing Twilight. The great SM owns e'erthang.  
**_

**Caitlin**

"So who is he?"

That was Laycee's greeting to me. Nice. "He's a vampire, someone I'm helping. Thanks for picking me up." Something in my tone told her to stop- Laycee had always been smart. She stopped.

I rested my head on the window. Being away from him was taking a toll; I was hyper but tired at the same time. The energy was negative; it was the hyped-up buzz of opposing magnets. I was physically tired, but reeling from what had happened. The problem was that I still loved Brian. I could never love another, till I was okay with his death.

When we got back to the house, I thanked her again and dragged myself up to my room. Flopping on my bed, I mustered the last of my energy and made the remote for my stereo float over to me. I hit the play button and closed my eyes.

_Step one you say we need to talk, he walks you say sit down it's just a talk… _I squeezed my eyes shut to hold back tears. The Fray's "How to Save a Life" swirled around the room; it was the story of Brian's death.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness and I would have stayed up with you all night had I known how to save a life… _The tears were flowing, remembering that night. True, I had told Johnson the truth. I just didn't tell him everything; didn't tell him how long I cried, or how much it hurt. I didn't mention how hard I tried to bring him back, and how empty it felt to have to leave.

_You lower yours and grant him one last choice, drive until you lose the road or break with the ones you've followed… _That's what it came to, I realized. A choice- hold on, or let go? Pain or release?

Brian or Johnson?

I shut my eyes tight and mouthed the next part of the song._ He will do one of two things, he will admit to everything or he'll say he's just not the same. _They weren't the same, not exactly. It didn't have to be a choice. Life couldn't be that cruel, could it? I could love the living, even though I belonged with the dead.

_And I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life. How to save a life. _I didn't save his life. I couldn't. I had to accept that.

Heart torn, I sank into an exhausted sleep.


	12. Future

_**This is a tribute to a friend! :D sammiiex3amazin (hi sam!)  
**_

_**hope y'all like it- REVIEW!**_

**Sam**

It gets boring when you can't sleep.

It's sort of an oxymoron why, though; the free time is completely useful and frankly better than sleep. You don't have to worry about getting tired, as long as you eat a lot.

But when you have nothing to do? Boring.

Sitting in my room, reading, was one of those times. Everyone else was studying, or in class, or in the gym or just out. I didn't want to cram, I had no classes and there was no way I was going to sit in, and I'm a naturally lazy person. So that left nothing for me.

In the middle of _The Outsiders,_ I realized something: I wasn't cooped up. Duh. One great thing about early maturity is that we get to come and go as we please, providing we don't have anything academic to do. So I took a quick look at my future: go outside or stay here? Going outside was a lot clearer. Happily, I put down my book and ran out into the sun.

Then I was stuck… Now what? I looked again: into the forest or down into town? Not much difference there, I chose the forest.

I got a very clear, very concrete vision as soon as I was through the trees. I was standing in a clearing with a vampire- the same vampire I had been seeing with Caitlin. _That _was new! I quickly made my way through the trees, using my instinct to guide me. I was sure I would recognize the place when I got there.

I was right. (Yeah, man.) I stepped into the little circle, staring at the back of the vampire sitting cross-legged with his eyes closed in the middle. He knew I was there- I could see him getting up- but all he did to acknowledge me was tighten the muscles in his back. Nervously, I checked again: He wasn't going to attack; he just wasn't sure why I was there.

Coming out of my trance, the first thing I saw was him standing in front of me. Man, vampires are quiet! I never spent much time around them; I'm not used to their speed and fluidity. So I was a bit spooked.

"Jeez!" I gasped. "You could make a _little _bit of noise, you know. It wouldn't kill you."

He merely shrugged, still cautious. "I'm sorry?" It sounded like a question. He (unnecessarily) cleared his throat. "Um, who are you?"

Oh, right. He didn't know me from Eve, but I already felt like I knew him from my visions. "Yeah, I'm Sam. I don't know if Cait mentioned me, but I'm a good friend of hers, and I see the future, sort of." Another flash of vision told me what to say next. "That's why I'm here, you know. I've been seeing you, and her, a ton." He looked really confused. I sighed.

"My power isn't concrete. I can see what will happen when you decide to do things, but I can't see exactly what you're going to do. Oh, and the clearer something is the more likely it's going to happen. Hmm… I can see what you chose to do about four seconds before you do it, as well."

He still wasn't sure what I was talking about. "What? _Why_ are you here?" I suppressed a sigh. This was nauseating.

"I'm here to tell you what's happening. I know the score, a lot better than you or her do. I can easily see her."

"…see her doing what?"

"Being in love with you. She loves you, Johnson, but she doesn't know it yet. Or she's scared to admit it." Once again, I knew what to do because of my visions. Damn, they sure did come in handy. "I'm here to tell you that if something happens to her, it's your head. She's like my sister, hell, she's everyone's sister, and she had a tough time a while ago that she hasn't let go of." I stared dead into his golden eyes to make sure he knew I meant it. "There are much more of us, many with physical powers that can leave quite a dent in a vampire's skin. Be careful with her, Johnson; she doesn't look breakable but it's easier than you could imagine."

Despite the fact that he acted like I had three heads, I think he got it. Slowly, he nodded and softly asked, "Why do your eyes change color?"

What? What was he talking about? "Huh? My eyes don't change color…" Then I remembered. I laughed shortly. "Our eyes change color when we use our power. I'm so used to it, I don't even remember half the time. Hybrids, I mean, not just me and Cait. I don't think her eyes even change color, actually, because of how powerful she is." When a hybrid uses its power, their eyes flash a brilliant purple. I see it so much that I'm used to it, but thinking back, I don't think Cait's eyes have ever flashed when she uses one of her powers. Maybe it was because her eyes were already so strange? Or maybe because the powers weren't really hers.

He half smiled and interrupted my thought rant. "Hmm. So you can see the future?"

"Yeah." Jeez, pick it and stick it. This guy sure jumped topics a whole lot.

But he ignored the tone in my voice, obviously. "I have a sister that can see the future. Not exactly like you, but it's the same concept." Oh, man, that was cool. I guess I looked pretty eager, because he laughed.

Whatever, I hadn't met another being that could tell the future like me besides Caitlin. And she didn't count, because she could do everything. "Really? How does it work? Can she see exactly what's going to happen? Can she change what she sees…?" I started asking questions a mile a minute. He just stood there, smiling slightly and listening to me rant on. Friends have always told me that people are naturally comfortable around me, and this was perfect proof.

"Relax." I stopped talking. "I don't know a thing about how her power works; I just know that I can borrow it."

"What? You can borrow powers." I very clearly saw myself with a short, black haired vampire. "And is she short with black hair?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, to both." Happily, I said, "I'll be meeting her soon enough anyway."

Again, he rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I can take the power of other _vampires_- it's never worked with your kind. It's sort of like… If you had two dollars- representing your power- I could take one dollar; half. It's less for both you and I."

I was amazed. "I've never heard of that before!"

"I'm one of a kind."

I laughed. "Must be why Cait loves you, she never goes for the normal boys."

He looked hesitant, like he wanted to ask me something but wasn't sure how. I glared at him. "You know, I'll know anyway right before you say it. Spit it out."

He sighed. "Who is Brian?" My jaw dropped. "She mentioned him once or twice, and all I know is that she loved him a lot. And she's in pain over him." His face was composed, but his eyes were pleading. Something made me feel like he wanted her to be okay as much as we did.

I sat on the ground. "Did she tell you the whole story?" He nodded. "Even about what happened when she got here?" Confused looking, he shook his head at that. I took a deep breath.

"When Caitlin got here- and you're hearing this second hand, Cait's about 218; I certainly wasn't alive then- she was angry, alone, and suspicious. She really didn't trust anyone when she stepped off the plane. But then, I guess, no one does." He interrupted with, "How did you end up here, Sam?"

"I ran away. My parents didn't understand why I always knew what was going to happen- hell, I didn't either- and tried using me for money." Disgusting. "So I got out, and found myself in Boston. Cait thinks we gravitate to large areas of other hybrids naturally." He nodded.

"Anyway, she was wary around anyone. Defiantly better than she would have been, but jumpy and destructive with her untrained power. Then she started class, two days after she got here, and was with Brian. They were perfect for each other; it was obvious as soon as they were in the same room.

"You know how wolfmen imprint?" He nodded again. "We do too, but it's less strong- we have only a very tiny little bit of wolfman in us. Like vampire perfection for each other and wolfman imprinting, mixed together. They were it.

"So she met him, they hit it off immediately, and she calmed down. She settled in, all because of him. And I guess he was special; he died before I never met him, but Logan and Gunny talk about him like he's great. He could shapeshift into any animal ever living in the blink of an eye. More importantly, he was Cait's match. She was happy, she was making friends and good grades, she had a family.

"Then, a couple years later, when she was 17- and you can't tell her, okay? She doesn't have any idea. Logan and Gunny were there, they know better than me but they're keeping it from her- she and Brian were out flying, helping the military with an attack site. (They didn't know, obviously.) Anyway, they were flying back to Boston over New York City. Of course there was a huge crowd on the ground, America had just been attacked. But they had to fly over the crowd, and were concentrating on not being seen.

"Then Brian was shot- this was the first time. Caitlin didn't realize it till he was about fifty feet over the ground, and even then the crowd saw him. She panicked, and teleported and caught him. She flew his body to a rooftop.

"He was dead, and still in bird form. Caitlin has less power now, did you know that? She could have been the most powerful alpha in history, if it hadn't been for someone out to get Brian. Anyway, she was still not in complete control of her power, it was raw and almost unique from her. She turned him back into human form, and channeled all her healing energy into him.

"He was dead, and she almost killed herself to save him. When they found them both on the rooftop, Brian was alive and had no scars, no bruises, no cuts… He was the best he had ever been. Caitlin, however… She looked like she had been burnt yesterday, every cut, every bruise she had ever had was there. She had literally given every last drop of healing energy she had to bring him back to life.

"So she was in the hospital and in a coma for two months. No one knew what was going to happen, because it had never happened before. But she did end up waking up, still beat up. She heals a little slower now, than she did before. And when she woke up, she remembered nothing of it. So we try to hide it from her- no one wants it to happen again.

"And that's it. She knows nothing of it- hide your thoughts around her, by the way." I looked at him. He was thoughtful.

"And she never got over it? When he died a second time?" I nodded.

"She likes art."

Once again, I had no idea what he was talking about. I scowled. He laughed.

"Sorry about my jumping around, I do it around family a lot. I feel like I've known you forever!" And it was my turn to laugh. Everyone felt like that around me.

Still smiling, he continued. "She said she loves art, but she's a musician."

I studied him thoughtfully. He was perspective and smart. "Music is a bigger part of her life than she gives it credit for. Did you know her mother was a music major?"

"She didn't talk about her family a lot."

Sadly, I murmured, "She probably didn't. Cait is afraid of missing them, so she avoids the topic." Seeing his next question in the future, I answered, "She doesn't want to forget Brian- how can you forget your soulmate? Would you want to?" He had no answer.

Seeing the future again, I smacked my head. "Crap! I have to be back in two minutes. Class, you know." I made a face, and ran into the forest yelling over my shoulder, "We'll see each other again soon!"

Halfway there, I was struck by another vision. I slowed down to a walk, shocked, and slowly made my way back through the forest.


End file.
